For the Wildewomen

It has been a beautiful, wintry week here in Portland. The sun is shining and the air is cold -- the wind blows right through. But I haven't minded. After a beautiful weekend inside, cozily connecting with an incredible group of women, I feel quite warm.

Monday morning, I took my pup and myself to an island outside of the city, to walk on the beach, connect to the Earth, and be.

The morning had been foggy, even as we were driving out, but then it was clear.  So we played...

And saw the mountain and watched boats go by on the river, and birds fly and perch.

As we walked down the sand as far as we could go, the river and the land grew closer, revealing the intertwined roots of the trees that live there at the edge together: growing, falling, and becoming.

I walked through the roots and branches and found a spot where the land is becoming sand and beach, and the river laps at its edge.

All of it reminding me of the luscious, wild beauty of life's continual becoming.


The word 'Wildewomen' is a riff on the name of one of my favorite songs, "Wildewoman", by Lucius.

Coasting

Sometimes life surprises you, and when you think it's going to rain, you end up seeing the moon and stars over the sea...

Or when you least expect it, you make some new friends and are invited to have a fun and satisfying weekend out at the Coast.

Foggy, rainy, no matter. What's shines through is the shared experience of being close, and being glad to be in a big house with a bunch of other folks who also want to be there.

We need each other in this life.  Not just to listen and care, but to challenge, share, and be. The older I get, the more I appreciate the diversity of our shared experience of being human.

No one can argue with certain types of beauty, we all know what Spring feels like...

But we are also all different, and going along in life in our own way, making it easy to forget that we are part of the same tribe.

It's nice to be reminded.

Happy Spring!

Shivertime

Winter came to Portland this week, did it arrive where you are?  For us, it is here, that special movement of inward longing and reflecting that I both love and fear; a movement that involves preparing, evaluating, waiting, hoping.

As it is suddenly (seemingly) dark before 5 pm, and the cold settles in on the ground, I find it takes work to allow the movement that is Winter to permeate my being and do its work.  It asks me to close my eyes and just be...

This asking can be difficult. We long for color and light, things to whisk us away from darker feelings, thoughts, and dreams. But it is only by appreciating our inner depths that we can truly scale the heights. So Winter offers a time to go soul-spelunking, if you will.

I find that the deeper I go, the more I am rewarded by the light that reveals itself to be within the darkness. This is the diamond in the coal: the fiery heart of our own nature, full of light we cannot even begin to comprehend.

As the light leaves and the leaves fall, we see the nature of reality.

Life comes from seemingly nowhere, bursts forth in beauty, blows in the breeze and turns its face to the sun.

When it is time, it turns golden and releases, falling and dancing free before finding rest, and what will be its next beginning.

Winter is for rest and the nurture of what is to come. Winter invites us towards growth and whispers one of nature's great secrets: face the darkness and be rewarded with light.

Finding Your Inner Rose

A few weeks ago now, I went for a walk in the Portland Rose Garden with a friend. I had had one of those weeks, and walking among the flowers felt like a balm for my heart.

Roses give rise to all kind of metaphor, don't they? They are such a literary tease.

Their beautiful smell, the thorns, the perfect shapes and petals. They are truly a gift to us human earthlings, reminding us of what's important in life, and that thorns are a part of it all.

A rose shows us so much about how to relate to ourselves; about what gives rise to gorgeous blossoms.

The alchemy of care and thorns and weather produces a display that takes your breath away. But to achieve this, we must be able to recognize rose from weed, and this goes for us and our own hearts, too.

As we seek happiness and the expression of our true self, we must patiently look for the rose within, the blossom waiting to unfold. Often it is invisible to us, wintering away, hidden by other plants that can look much easier to tend; or that we have long ago mistaken for a rose.

But with patience, we can find that gorgeous blossom, and once we've found it, we no longer mistake anything else for our own precious rose, unique and perfect and ours alone.

For both the rose and ourselves, summer is a time of full expression, the culmination of a year spent working patiently, hoping for sun.

May you experience the joy of your own inner rose, the part of you that no one else can touch, but that, with care, will always be there for you.

Knocking from the Inside

Love is a verb.

This is a pretty popular saying these days, or idea.  Love is action, love is what is, not what you think.  Love is of the world, as are we, and the world around us is loving us, all the time.  Do you see it?

I feel this the most at the coast. As I've written about before, I am so lucky to live near the beautiful Oregon Coast.  And on a perfect Friday afternoon a couple of weeks ago, K. and I set out for an impromptu trip to Cannon Beach, a small town just West of Portland.

That's Haystack Rock you see in the background, twice.  And this is me... with K.'s photographic whimsy thrown in.

But enough about that.  Let's talk about love.  What is love?  Is there a more important question?

I see and feel love everywhere.  It is life itself.  Often in session I will guide my clients to feel how life is loving them, just by being.  How the energy of life is love, breathing in and out of them, their cells, their very being.  And when you go to the coast, and feel the energy of the waves crashing and the wind and maybe, just maybe, the sun or sunset...

or feel the trail under your feet, even it's a bit muddy...

That's all love is to me.  No need to look for it, no need to seek it.  You find it by surrendering to the moment, by living the life that is yours, by being a creature of the universe.

As the Sufi poet Rumi said many years ago:

I have almost driven myself mad,

wanting to know reasons,

knocking on a door.

It opens.

I have been knocking from the inside.

Get outside!

The Green & Gracious Mirror

Mmmm... the first almost Spring days brought me not just one but two walks outside this past weekend...

I love to walk in the cold of late winter.  The fresh green air has a way of surfacing important and overarching themes, while dispersing the mundane and petty.  As I walk, worries shed and creativity and motivation take their place. It is a very strong medicine for me.

Stillness, aliveness, newness, deadness.  It is all there in the Earth just before she awakens to Spring.  And all that is inside each one of us too. Nature invites us to learn from her, and to find our connection back to ourselves through seeing her as a reflection of our own inner world.

The past two winters have gone by quickly for me. I cannot believe that it is almost March, and that summer plans are already being discussed and put on the calendar. K & I tend to hibernate in Winter, we're not snow folks, so I am already dreaming of wildflowers on the hillsides of the Columbia River Gorge, and that cleansing wind.

I saw this quote today:

“He who is outside his door already has the hardest part of his journey behind him.” — Dutch proverb 

There have been very important days in my life, when important events occurred, that began with my simply saying to myself, "Just put on your shoes and go outside."  Which meant I walked...

And looked up....

And saw new things and beautiful things.

May your day bring something fresh and new and true, and may that bring you closer to your self.

Practice for Bringing on the New

If you can go outside...

Put on some walking shoes and your coat and hat and scarf (if appropriate),
Drink a big glass of water
Open your door
Go outside.

Stop.
Look at the sky,
Breathe...

Walk
Look at a tree branch, notice its beauty
Breathe....

Walk
Listen for birdsong, hear the kindred spirit there,
Breathe...

And Walk and Remember
Remember that you are a child of the Earth and that you don't have to earn the right to live this life. Every being alive has the right to just be.  And that includes you.

So walk...
and breathe...

If you can't go outside...

Find a window to look out of,
Look at the sky,
Or a tree branch,
And just be, just watch and breathe.

Fill up with beauty,
Allow yourself to feel light and loved.

It's Always Sunny in Portland

For those of you who know the show, the reference doesn't quite work. But, it was sunny today in Portland! On November 30th! I went for a walk to celebrate.

K. and I meandered around downtown for a bit, had some lunch, and then I sauntered myself down to the river. The Sun! There it was. Blue sky! Shadows!

The day make me think that part of the depressing nature of grey weather is missing our own shadow. Could it be? It felt nice to see mine today, as well as those cast by leaves and trees and other folks.

Some days call us more to LIFE; some, not so much.  Or, not so obviously.  Some days we have to work harder to understand what that particular day (unique and never to be there again) is telling us.  There is always a message, there is always something about ourselves and the mystery of life we can learn. Even when it rains, or is just oppressively grey all day long.

But that was not today!

May your day be filled with exploration.  May your day call you to discover both life and yourself and then find that it is the same seeking.  May you have the chance to feel a winter sun on your face, or, if not, to imagine it.  May you know that that is the stuff of love.

Thank You

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and today I simply wanted to say, thank you.

Thank you for reading my blog. Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for supporting my heart and spirit.

Thank you for another day on this beautiful planet. Thank you for raindrops. Thank you for red leaves wet on the ground.

Thank you for your laughter, your warmth, your strong arms. Thank you for your smiles. Thank you for your tears. Thank you for sharing your dreams with me.

Thank you world for another year of life. Thank you for the opportunity to speak and the chance to share.

And thank you for all things beautiful, all things difficult, all things new.

Happy Thanksgiving, and thank you, dear reader, for you.